Chocolate or Fungus?

This isn't a question about which I prefer.

I am a big mushroom fan -- salads, omelets, soups, pizza -- though I am not a mushroom connoisseur. I know the difference between a portobello and a shitake, but I have never gone out of my way to eat a porcini, oyster, chanterelle, or morel.

Still, as much as I like mushrooms, good chocolate, especially dark chocolate, is its own sanctified food group for me. (But please don't send me any more, at least not now. I have a hefty supply.) I am sure this is not a rare preference.

I look at mushrooms differently now. My fungal pneumonia and fungal oral infection have taken the "fun" out of fungus for me. Sure, some of them look cute and harmless and round and white there in the produce aisle, but other members of the family stalk hospitals looking for defenseless bodies to invade.

Which brings me to my tongue. The first time the ENT docs came to look at my gum sore, he recoiled a little when I stuck out my tongue.

"How long has your tongue looked like that?"

"Probably since I just finished a chocolate pudding."

He was OK with that, and proceeded with the investigation that eventually led to oral surgery. I took a picture, because I thought it was funny that it freaked him out a little. (He more than got revenge.)

Last night, at the end of a wonderful birthday, I had a couple of exquisite chocolates for dessert. (Thanks, Mara!)

When I was brushing my teeth a little later, I noticed that my tongue looked a lot like the picture above. Chocolate, I thought. I tried brushing my tongue -- no change. The saline mouthwash I use had no effect. Upon closer inspection in the mirror, my tongue appeared to have a slightly spongy texture, but it was hard to say. The brown color was definitely in and not on the tongue.

I called the nurse to take a look, who put in a call to the night doctor, who wasn't sure what it was but prescribed an anti-fungal lozenge. Curse you, fiendish fungi!

I have to believe that this is a new development -- that the initial brown tongue really was chocolate pudding, and that this current discoloration is something new. Doctors have been looking in my mouth several times a day over the last week, and surely they would have mentioned this discoloration.

This morning, my tongue is still brown. It's clearly not a chocolate-coated tongue.

A quick Google tells me that Black Tongue is an unsightly (I'll say!) but harmless condition, sometimes caused by prolonged use of broad-spectrum antibiotics (which I am on). That's reassuring, but it's still gross.

Chocolate or fungus? In this case, probably neither, or maybe some of each.

Update: Apparently, I have had a brown tongue for at least a week. It's so common that nobody thought to mention it.