It Never Always Gets Worse

My friend Jim Yost told me about a mantra that ultrarunners tell themselves. Ultrarunners do crazy things like run 100 miles though mountains and deserts, or run for six days straight. As you might imagine, these runners go through some very rough, dark patches. The mantra Jim told me was, "It never always gets worse." So, even if it just keeps getting harder and more painful through miles 60, 70, 80, eventually you reach a point where it no longer gets worse, and maybe it even gets a little better.

That mantra has been working for me lately. I may not feel good on Thursday, and Friday might be worse than Thursday, and so on, and so on. But I know that someday will be better than the day before. Like today! Appetite is better, eyes are ugly but functional, post-nasal flow is down to a post-nasal drip, and I had my first non-feverish reading in days.

My reward for feeling better is another bone marrow biopsy and a batch of CT and x-ray scans, checking out my sinuses, teeth, and lungs. In part, the scans are to look for a fever explanation, but they also provide baseline measures for evaluating my post-transplant. The biopsy will help them decide whether to recommend going straight to transplant or to go with the more typical schedule of leaving the hospital for a week or two before getting the transplant.

The biopsy already happened. It was pretty much like last time, but it took a lot longer. The doctor got a great workout. I got another pain in the butt. (Hip, really, but that doesn't sound as good.) I'm about to be turned over to Transport to get some CT scans. If you don't hear from me in a day, tell them to search the basement for a guy wearing a pirate cap.